10 Things I Didn’t Understand Until I Had a Baby

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Looking adorable in our matching Brok Boys outfits.
  1. It’s hard not to think your baby is a genius.
    Newborn babies are basically snuggly, needy, little potatoes so when they start to learn new skills like grabbing things, rolling around, and waving it feels like a miracle. We get that this is normal behaviour but just let us gush about it ok?
  2. Everything disgusting is less disgusting when it’s your baby.
    I once watched my friend suck snot out of her baby’s nose with a tube, “look away” she shouted as I audibly gagged. Fast forward a few years and guess who is the NoseFrida pro now? (Full transparency: I totally gagged the first couple of times I used it, it’s still disgusting, just LESS disgusting.)
  3. All the cliches about time are true.
    “The days go by slow but the years go by quickly.” Accurate AF. You want to roll your eyes when people say this at the start but then one day you wake up and you have a 10 month old you have to WWF style wrestle just to put on their pyjamas. And I thought my pregnancy went by fast!
  4. You do forget the pain and discomfort of labour.
    Feeling like I had been kicked by a kangaroo, I sat on a special cushion for my tailbone, with a bag of ice between my legs and thought “never again… NEVER. AGAIN.” It took some time but after healing, sleeping, and remembering to eat, the negative memories of my labour faded and the happy memories flourished. (No, this is not an open invitation to ask me if I am pregnant or trying.)
  5. You don’t mess with nap time.
    Coordinating a visit with a friend who has a napping baby can be difficult. Trying to visit with a friend whose baby is an absolute terror because they skipped their nap? Even more difficult!
  6. Babies don’t sleep in even if they stay up late.
    If you go to a party and keep your baby out past their bedtime they they will most definitely make you pay for it by not sleeping in, and will probably wake up even earlier than normal. It’s the baby’s world and we’re just living in it.
  7. The nicest thing you can bring a new mom is food.
    Don’t fret, this isn’t one of those rants about what to do / what not to do when visiting a new mom. If you’re visiting your friend, that’s already a nice gesture but bringing her food will definitely put you in her good books. Remembering to eat can be a challenge with a new babe, let alone actually finding the time to make something.
  8. We’re all obsessed with our own babies.
    My baby and I? We spend A LOT of time together. You would think that I’d get sick of her but sometimes, before I go to bed I scroll through photos of her and make my husband look at them too. I know, I know, she’s turned me into a weirdo. Apologies to my friends without babies, I can’t help it!
  9. Babies are wonderful ice breakers.
    Not literally of course, they’d be terrible with an ice pick (such a dad joke, sorry I just couldn’t resist). I’m so grateful for all of the new friends I’ve met over the past year and all of the people who reached out to me after I had a baby. There’s just something about a baby ravaging your body motherhood that makes you feel connected.
  10. They’re worth it.
    Before I had a baby I thought I was way too selfish and impatient to be a parent. People would try to convince me that I should have babies but in the process they would end up making it sound terrible. There is no doubt about it: babies are a ton of work (see snot sucking example #2) but none of that matters when they’re your own. You love your spouse, you love your dog, sure. The love you have for your baby? Deeper and more fierce than any love you’ve felt before; you would do anything for that little potato without thinking twice.

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